So since my last post (geeze how long ago was that?!?) I have fallen off the wagon, laid in self-pity on the ground, realized that hitting rock bottom isn't loosing (but sitting there is), and drug my ass back up. Now I am back on schedule, until my work week begins again, I am feeling refreshed, and I am hopefully recovering from my two steps back throughout last week.
I have this terrible habit of running myself into the ground because I bite off more than I can chew and then getting myself so physically exhausted that I shut down mentally and emotionally. Granted I cannot help it that my manager needs me to work 6 days a week, and that 4 out of those 6 days are until midnight or later. But I can help that I actually DON'T have to be in the barn 10 hours a day before getting ready and driving over for my shift. This takes a lot of self control, and sometimes standing up for myself in order to get the rest I need in order to be at my best. I unfortunately fell victim to my own weakness and took on too much last week, resulting in a very embarrassing Facebook message to my ex, and then lots of apologizing the next day, followed with a "and please don't message me" attached at the end of it, oops!
I did have successful schooling show with the baby horses though- funny considering they are both older than Goose haha. Cullen was a rock star after freaking out in warm-up and finished with two clear rounds and two red ribbons! Then Louis came out and after only getting to jump one fence WON his hunter class! Could not be more proud of my two black ponies. Goose was his usual bad-a$$ self, I just checked out for those rounds. Whoops
This week started off with me getting my mind back in the right spot, and then moving forward from there. I had a nice long talk with my riding coach about how I psyche myself out and self destruct in the ring, hellooooooo no confidence!, and then I followed that up with a stellar jump lesson on my fabulous little horse, all at proper training height. I then realized that I am sitting right at the 90 day mark for my protein/kick this fat ass into shape diet and while I have lost quite a bit of weight, I have plateaued from where I was the last time I took some pictures of myself. Alrighty, back to the old grind of working my butt off and taking no prisoners or excuses. I then proceeded to jump right back into my workout routine of squats, calf raises, push ups, and ab work every other day. Great idea, right? Right! Until I was left unable to walk at work the next evening- haha whoops again!
From there it seems that my week has actually been moving forward though, with a great flat ride on my horse early this morning, 210 square bales unloaded and stacked (Thank you Maggie and your big (wo)manly muscles for the help!), all of my horses ridden the last four days, and two full exercises in the books. While I wish I had found time to run on my two days off I also feel like I took the appropriate down time and did myself a favor by sitting on the deck, enjoying the evening, a beer, and relaxing a bit before my next 6 day work week kicks off tomorrow.
Finally- A HUGE shoutout to the girl who has worked harder than anyone I know to achieve her dreams. Miss Meghan O'Donoghue and her kick-ass TB Pirate are named as alternates for the US WEG squad. At only 25 she is the youngest competitor named this year from the US. Way to go guys! Now to fund a plane ticket......
Until next time kids!
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